In the aftermath of a deeply divisive presidential election, one American family found that the political was intensely personal, leading to a heartbreaking schism during what is traditionally a time for togetherness. Author Andrea Tate shared her story of how the 2024 election results led her to make a drastic decision: canceling Thanksgiving and Christmas with her husband’s family. Her account provides a raw look at how political convictions are testing the bonds of marriage and family across the nation, revealing a chasm that festive cheer could not bridge.
The conflict began the morning after the election. Tate described herself as being so devastated by the outcome that she was unable to leave her bed, instead engaging in what she called “doomscrolling” through social media. It was during this time that she encountered a post from her own husband celebrating Donald Trump’s victory. The post, which read “God Bless America. God bless #45, 47,” ignited a profound sense of anger and betrayal in her. The man she loved had voted for a candidate whose policies she viewed as fundamentally destructive to the country.
Unable to confront him face-to-face, Tate communicated her feelings via text message. She demanded he take the post down out of respect for her and her friends. Then, she delivered the consequential news about their holiday plans. She instructed him to tell his family that she would not be attending Thanksgiving and would not be hosting Christmas, stating bluntly, “I need space.” This single text message dismantled months of family tradition and set the stage for a season of separation rather than celebration.
When her husband later approached her, attempting to de-escalate the situation with a peace offering of coffee, Tate stood by her decision. She explained to him that she could no longer bite her tongue as she had in previous election cycles. The idea of sitting at a table with fifteen people who had voted for Trump was, to her, an impossibility. She stated she did not want to risk causing a scene or disrespecting his family in their own home, so she believed complete removal from the situation was the only viable option.
For Tate, the issue was not merely a difference of political opinion but a profound moral divide. She articulated that she could not, in good conscience, unwrap gifts from or pass the turkey to individuals she believed had voted for policies that would harm vulnerable groups, restrict women’s rights, and enable what she described as “internment camps and mass deportation.” Her husband did not argue with her decision, nor did he remove the social media post that started the conflict, leaving the couple in a quiet, holiday-season standoff that reflects the deep divisions running through countless American households.
